A screen name is an important thing. Not only does it let people track all the comments you make during your tenure on a website, but it also let’s people know what to expect from you. Perhaps you’ve chosen a name strictly for laughs, perhaps your screen name proclaims your undying love for a particular star, perhaps you chose a name based on someone famous to uplift and inspire your compatriots. And maybe, just maybe, you actually are that famous figure, come to this website to share some of your wisdom and grace with the public.
Can we get an inspirational quote from one of these figures to start us off?
Alright, I’m inspired. Let’s do this.
How kind the former president to show up, and with his trademark message of love and tolerance.
I thought Abraham Lincoln was against slavery?
The universe is made of matter. The internet is made of meme.
Dumbass doesn’t even know that Hoes is grASS type.
Ah, yes, Mexican Batman, vigilante protector of the southern province of Pόundtόwn.
Every celebrity has to have a philanthropy.
For somebody claiming to not be a gorilla you sure type like one.
Jesus Christ, man. Have you no decency?!
No, not you! Go away.
Currently? Are you typing while pumping? Frankly, I’m impressed you didn’t make any typos.
Cure for what? Who’s dying? Of sexiness? Was it all of the women? What country is this?
I have several reservations about your logic.
See a doctor. For your head and your dick.
H…A…R…A…M… oh, god dammit! Let’s just get all of these out of the way right now.
No, thank YOU, Harambe.
I saw him next to Biggie and Elvis selling medcards on Venice Beach.
And that made you rock hard, right?
That’s not what Harambe would have wanted, brother.
That’s more likes than I’ll ever get on all my social media posts combined.
You don’t say that.
As opposed to somebody else’s?
Barry O’s real legacy.
If you like this you’ll love Walmart.
This girl really knows her way around a grill.
“It’s Impossible,” said Pride. “It’s risky,” said experience. “It’s pointless,” said reason. “Give it a try,” whispered the heart.
Just your daily reminder that the internet is a strange, godless hellscape.