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Comments on Comments V: Celebrity Guests

A screen name is an important thing. Not only does it let people track all the comments you make during your tenure on a website, but it also let’s people know what to expect from you. Perhaps you’ve chosen a name strictly for laughs, perhaps your screen name proclaims your undying love for a particular star, perhaps you chose a name based on someone famous to uplift and inspire your compatriots. And maybe, just maybe, you actually are that famous figure, come to this website to share some of your wisdom and grace with the public.

Can we get an inspirational quote from one of these figures to start us off?

Comment on a pornography website

Alright, I’m inspired. Let’s do this.

Comment on a pornography websiteHow kind the former president to show up, and with his trademark message of love and tolerance.

Comment on a pornography websiteI thought Abraham Lincoln was against slavery?

Comment on a pornography websiteThe universe is made of matter. The internet is made of meme.

Comment on a pornography websiteDumbass doesn’t even know that Hoes is grASS type.

Comment on a pornography websiteAh, yes, Mexican Batman, vigilante protector of the southern province of Pόundtόwn.

Comment on a pornography websiteEvery celebrity has to have a philanthropy.

Comment on a pornography websiteFor somebody claiming to not be a gorilla you sure type like one.

Comment on a pornography websiteJesus Christ, man. Have you no decency?!

Comment on a pornography websiteNo, not you! Go away.

Comment on a pornography websiteO shit!

Comment on a pornography websiteCurrently? Are you typing while pumping? Frankly, I’m impressed you didn’t make any typos.

Comment on a pornography websiteCure for what? Who’s dying? Of sexiness? Was it all of the women? What country is this?

Comment on a pornography websiteI have several reservations about your logic.

Comment on a pornography websiteSee a doctor. For your head and your dick.

Comment on a pornography websiteH…A…R…A…M… oh, god dammit! Let’s just get all of these out of the way right now.

Comment on a pornography websiteNo, thank YOU, Harambe.

Comment on a pornography websiteI saw him next to Biggie and Elvis selling medcards on Venice Beach.

Comment on a pornography websiteAnd that made you rock hard, right?

Comment on a pornography websiteThat’s not what Harambe would have wanted, brother.

Comment on a pornography websiteThat’s more likes than I’ll ever get on all my social media posts combined.

Comment on a pornography websiteYou don’t say that.

Comment on a pornography websiteAs opposed to somebody else’s?

Comment on a pornography websiteBarry O’s real legacy.

Comment on a pornography websiteIf you like this you’ll love Walmart.

Comment on a pornography websiteThis girl really knows her way around a grill.

Comment on a pornography website“It’s Impossible,” said Pride. “It’s risky,” said experience. “It’s pointless,” said reason. “Give it a try,” whispered the heart.

Comment on a pornography websiteJust your daily reminder that the internet is a strange, godless hellscape.

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One thought on “Comments on Comments V: Celebrity Guests

  1. I am forsaking all pornography for Lent. This article made it significantly easier to uphold my pledge, because I remember how fucking retarded it all is. Thank you for protecting my virtue and chastity, finger yelly man

    Like

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